Overcoming the fear of change is not an easy thing to do, however, it is possible.
In this post, I want to introduce you to the change cycle and help you to recognise where you are currently at within it.
There are six steps in the change cycle, and there’s a good chance that you have been on each one of them at some point in your life, perhaps even multiple times.
So, lets take a look at the steps.
- Discontent – You are not entirely satisfied with how your life is and know there must be a better way of living and more to life than what you are currently experiencing. You ‘hang in there’, and tolerate, ignore or repress it because it’s familiar and you are unsure if you are ready to make changes.
- Breaking Point – Eventually, your level of discontent builds high enough that you cannot take any more suffering. You reach breaking point, either through exhaustion or due to a dramatic event that triggers the break.
- Decision – You decide that you are ready to grow and change and affirm that you will no longer allow the undesirable situation to continue. You take the first step toward change, giving you a short-lived sense of hope.
- Fear – Usually, soon after your feelings of excitement and motivation, you encounter fear. You become uncomfortable and apprehensive about the idea of changing. You question your decision. Both options look bleak at this step. You feel incapable and empty.
- Amnesia – The fear of change grows so intense that you forget how difficult the original circumstances were and you begin to believe that perhaps it wasn’t so bad after all. The idea of being back in that situation feels more comfortable than the idea of change. It’s familiar and it’s your comfort zone, and so you resist letting go. You temporarily forget why you even wanted to change.
- Backtracking – This is the step where you decide to go back on your decision to change, and typically, talk yourself out of it.
Do you recognise yourself in this cycle of change? Where are you currently stuck within it?
Ideally, if you are considering having one-to-one coaching with me, you will be at step 1.5 . Now, I know you are probably thinking, ‘Michelle, there isn’t a step 1.5!’, so allow me to explain further.
Step 1.5 is between step 1 and 2. Step 1.5 is where you haven’t yet reached breaking point, you’re not pulling your hair out in frustration or having a complete breakdown, because thankfully, it doesn’t have to reach that stage before you choose to change. However, you are further along than step 1 where the idea of change is nice, but you’re not sure if it’s for you. You know that change is 100% necessary, and you are not prepared to accept any less for yourself, even if you don’t know exactly what needs to change or how you will do it, you know that something must change. Because here’s the thing, sis, if you don’t change nothing will change. Change comes about through action, not by chance. Will you wait until you have reached breaking point before you to decide to change? Do you need to experience severe pain or loss before you consider yourself worthy of goodness? Will you continue to go round and round in the cycle wearing yourself down? Or will you take action now to do something about it?
Are you ready to take responsibility for your life and create the life you dream of having?
Are you at the point where you will allow nothing less than what you genuinely want?
Are you ready to take the pill of self-honesty, even if it is difficult because you are exhausted from being dissatisfied?
Can you see how this cycle of change has affected your life to this point and you are ready for it to end?
If you are saying, ‘YES’ to these questions then I am here to help you break free from this change cycle and go on to create a life that excites and fills you with joy inshaAllah.
I am offering a FREE 45-minute chat with me for you to get a taster of what Coaching can do for you when you step up and take responsibility for your life. In this session, we will take a look at where you’re currently at, where you want to be, and how coaching can help you to bridge that gap for you to go on and create powerful transformation in your life.